does anyone at all get where i’m coming from

__  __  __  __  __  __  __  __  __  __.

you know how some of the most wonderful people die unexpected, early deaths? those who fully deserve to live a much longer life? those who, if allowed to exist for some more time, will have brought unbridled joy into the lives of people around them? whatever took them away, be it a suicide, an accident– i sometimes wish fervently that it will put a halt to my existence instead, do a little exchange of our fates, let them have my life, let them have a chance at completing their teens and living for decades longer, years which will without doubt be immeasurably more fulfilling and meaningful than my entire lifetime may ever be.

if it could bring just one more worthy person back into the world, someone who has been dearly missed, someone who could and would make a difference in another’s life, or simply, someone who’s able to do a better job at Living than i am, then frankly i will earnestly give my Life–

after all it is getting quite tedious keeping up with this business of existing

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